Qilah's Testimony

My name is Aqilah. I am 21 years old. This is my fourth year serving as an advocate with Juveniles for Justice at the Juvenile Law Center. 

I first entered the child welfare system at age 15. It was a long, horrible journey. I've been bounced around through a few juvenile youth residential treatment facilities. I've had workers assigned to me through DHS and the courts. To this day I feel like I've encountered so many harmful and traumatic events while in the child welfare systems. I was expelled in the 11th grade due to truancy, ODD, and feeling frustrated with things happening in my life. After being expelled, I was sent to an alternative school, on probation, and later forced to go to a juvenile placement because of a GPS violation. When I got to the juvenile holding facility, no one notified the alternative, so they did not know I was in placement and constantly marked me absent while I was in the juvenile facility. 

They held me at the juvenile holding facility until a placement became available. Finally placed at an official placement I suffered from depression and I felt spiritless. I met with a psychiatrist there who I explained to that I was having trouble sleeping and was always sad. I was glad to talk to anyone, because I just wanted to express to someone how things were making me feel while I was at a residential treatment placement.  The placement prescribed me medicine as a child, that was too high in dosage and made me lightheaded, dizzy and made me throw up. I told this to my Philly CUA worker who then told me the medicine was for my own good. So, I told the psychiatrist I did not feel the medicine was making me feel better, I made a mistake telling her because this only led to them increasing  the medication they were giving me throughout my whole stay. I gained weight and I am scared of medicine to this day as an effect.

While at placement I felt I had to advocate for myself a lot, including attending a school off-grounds from the placement; a local community school where I had to be tested and was accepted. I was glad because the placement school was horrible. I was discharged from the placement at age 18. I did not leave with the documents that I needed like my school documents, my health records, or vital docs. I had to find my vital documents on my own. The placement or the local public school never gave me my diploma, so I had no proof that I graduated from high school.

There was no aftercare support after I left placement. No one talked to me about my safety when I got home. I wish I had more support to prepare for college or had someone who could have guaranteed my educational transition would be successful. Also, any mental wellness support and medications that were started in placement needed to be continued but when youth leave,  there is no person ensuring anything. If there was an office like a local Philadelphia Ombudsman Office, youth could go there to file complaints, and get accurate information on who is supposed to help and report when people are not supporting them. I could have used this office when I was over medicated, and when I didn’t receive appropriate support in placement, and when I left. No child or youth should have to do this alone, but I did. I was a kid, I deserved better. To expect that youth who go to placement will experience success and complete school is unrealistic because youth are not given enough guidance support. We need better options. I support having a local Philadelphia Ombudsman office so children and youth can get the real support they need.  

Banner photo credit - Eskay Lim via Unsplash